In Which I’m Brutally Honest About My Mothering Journey
This mothering journey can be complicated at times. I thought I’d be brutally honest, and share with you a recent experience I had!
I invited my sister and her family over for lunch on Sunday morning, but I extended the invitation at 10:00 on Saturday night (normally the way I work!). The house wasn’t horrible, but I wanted it cleaner for them to come over. I knew if my children would get up Sunday morning and quickly pitch in, they could get it tidied up while I got lunch going in the crockpot.
It all sounds good in theory, right? Cheerful children, a happy mom singing as she cooks, a husband downstairs diligently preparing his Sunday School class (he has taught a class on the book of Acts for the last 2 years at church!).
Home from church, with a big smile because his class of 2 years is finished!
The only problem is, my children don’t always catch my vision.
Instead of it taking 15-20 minutes, I spent the entire morning asking 2 of my children to keep working. Thankfully I had 1 diligent helper, but the rest of the morning I was scrambling by myself to get the parmesan chicken in the crockpot, baths done for two of the girls, clothes ironed, girls dressed and makeup on. There was no time for breakfast, and the girl’s hair was fixed at church.
It’s real life over here. I wasn’t yelling at the children on the way to church, but I was very firmly talking to two of them, and grounded one of them who really struggles with laziness.
I arrived at church in a funk, but was hopeful that things would improve. It wasn’t meant to be though.
My 12 month old fussed all through Sunday School class. I walked all over the church building, gave her a bottle, tried to entertain her with a neat book, a squishy block that she normally likes, but she was having none of it.
Our first baby to be on formula. Yes, we are done breastfeeding. It’s a long story! I’m at peace though.
Finally, I just gave up. My husband was finishing his very last Sunday School class, and I really wanted to hear it. Instead, I choked back tears, got in the van, and went home with the baby.
She was laid down for a nap right away, and I threw myself on the couch. A number of things popped in my head that I would like to do, but I decided to read the last chapter of Acts myself. At least I could finish the 2 year long journey that way.
It’s always amazing how the Lord can turn rainclouds into blessings.
I turned on some music, and enjoyed the quiet house. I’ve been working on keeping the house cleaner, and putting more effort into cultivating a lovely environment for my family.
Wildflowers given to me by my children.
Instead of the paper plates I was planning on using, which would be served on our old, desperately needing refinished table, I got out the new tablecloth I had just found at Target. My husband had just blessed me with a brand new set of dishes, and so I unpacked those and set the table.
Lunch ended up being a success, and I was able to bless my sister with not cooking for a change, and to enjoy a pretty setting herself.
It was a short moment of encouragement. The baby woke up, fussy and in a bad mood again. But the Lord had given me that brief period of time to be refreshed.
We are tempted to think we are all alone in this mothering journey.
Discouragement can weigh us down, and we begin a pity party. Our children will never behave the way we want them to, the house has never in the past, or will never in the future be clean, we are destined to live our lives with clothes that have spit up, food (and worse) on them. Our life feels like it’s over, because it only consists of baby toys, how long do we have until we nurse the baby, change a diaper, or hear the next argument taking place.
Don’t believe the lie that you are alone! I’d love to encourage you, by sharing with you a short series of free videos that two mommy bloggers put together. It’s real life conversations between two popular mom bloggers, who have 8 children and 20 years of mothering experience between both of them!
Here’s another brutally honest statement. I didn’t get anything out of the first video when I first tried to watch it. However, I turned it on again when I was really needing some encouragement, and I did receive a big pick me up from watching it. So give them a try, you can watch them here.
*FYI – you will want to watch all three videos, because something super, duper special comes at the end!








You’re an awesome example, Caroline!
I relate to this so well! This mothering journey is messy, not neat and nice and smooth. There are victories, but so many things do not going according to plan. I’m slowly learning to meet God in the messiness of it. Thank you for the encouragement Caroline! I love the posts you write that give an inside look into your life. I learn a lot!
Thank you! Such a help to me today! (And I honestly think formula and other stress reducing things that some might consider “compromises” have saved my life/sanity!)
I know this time around, starting to supplement formula at 11 months, and weaning at 12 months was the best thing ever. It’s what we needed, and Sean and I are both glad we did it.
Just wondering why you were so set on breastfeeding before, but are now fine with formula?
I still am a firm believer that breastfeeding is the best thing for a baby. I never thought I would use formula, but just had so many different issues breastfeeding that finally I had to switch to supplementing to formula. We started supplementing with formula at 10 months, and I was able to nurse her on her first birthday, and totally weaned shortly after that. I never have nursed past 15 months, so I still felt good about giving her a great start in life!
I’ve followed your blog for years but never commented. I just wanted to say, you blessed me so much with this post. I grew up in central Missouri. I’m Christian too, married to a soldier (who is also a Christian :), and we are both 23 with a 2 year old boy and a 5 month old girl. I struggle so much with having my children in church with us. Our toddler is a pretty good little boy (thanks to Proverbs 13:24), but he still has a really hard time sitting still in church. And of course our daughter is at the wiggly, blabbering, wanting to be stood up and bounced around stage. Since there are only two of them, my husband and I are able to each hold one at a time. I find myself stressing the entire service about keeping them as quiet as possible, meeting their needs, and as a result not being able to really listen. I find myself in a very grumpy mood each time. Your post really speaks to my heart, and I plan to reread it several times.
I’m so glad the post was helpful to you! I totally understand being in a grumpy mood at church because of children. :/ Even when we had our first child, it was hard! He was a very fussy child and I wasn’t able to be in church with him for about a year. There are seasons of life where it does get better! 🙂
Not judging – promise- but you still shop at Target? With your very conservative views (which I really admire) I’m surprised you would shop at a store that goes against every conservative Christian view they possibly can.
No we don’t shop at Target right now. This post was written before the changes took place at Target. :/
Thank you for replying and for taking a stand. 🙂
Thank you for your honesty! It’s encouraging to know that other mums are going through the same things too.