UPDATE: The following article has been one of the most popular articles we have ever written. It is also becoming quite unpopular with some. We have decided to delete the more controversial comments in the article. Though our personal opinions have not changed on the issues discussed, The Modest Mom Blog is not intended as a forum for political or religious debate. Please accept our apology for allowing it to become so. Though much could be said in response to a number of comments which followed, The Modest Mom blog is not known as a debate forum, thus, we will refrain from responding but we will also be deleting any current or future comments on this post which would lead down that road. Thank-you 🙂

This is the sequel to the previous post my husband wrote for the She Wears Skirts series.

In my last post I described how I went from being completely oblivious to the issue of modesty to completely awestruck with how significant of a principle it is. I was “awestruck” for a number of reasons. First of all, I wondered how I could have lived 21 years of my life without once considering whether or not there was a right and wrong when it came to dress. Secondly, I was amazed by the beauty of it all. As you may recall, in my last post I recounted my first encounter with my future wife and her sister sitting across the room from me at a scripture study and what my initial reaction was to their appearance. In my ignorance, I could not conceive of any rational reason that would drive two young ladies to show up to a college scripture study in ankle length, floral pattern jumpers. Not only had I never seen anyone don such apparel, I honestly didn’t know if I ever cared to see it again – not because it was displeasing to my eye, but because it was displeasing to my heart. Why you ask? Seeing them “set apart” in their dress made me uncomfortable – more uncomfortable that I cared to admit at the time. I was used to the short shorts, the tight tops, and the form fitting everything else. I had become much too well acquainted with this sort of revealing dress and if I would have been honest with myself, I would have confessed that it had done nothing but aid in the development of many of the vile affections that then abided in my heart. Scanning the room that night, my eyes came into contact with something that absolutely shook the foundations of my pitiable understanding concerning the issue of dress. As it was, however, I quickly took shelter in counsel of my heart (not the safest place to be) and reemerged from this cellar like nothing had ever happened. To be sure, I could not deny that there had been an earthquake, but it hadn’t phased me. Strange that it even shook me at all. And so, I settled myself by allowing a single word to characterize what I had seen – weird. Case closed. Back to the real world.

Fast forward almost a year later and I was to discover that this earthquake had aftershocks like you wouldn’t believe. Passing through the room of this same scripture study, I spotted one of these young ladies (Caroline in this instance) sitting meekly in the corner and the words came to my mind so clearly, “That is the sort of woman you ought to marry.” I had come a looooong way – from “weird” to to wedlock. Now, what I would have you to understand is that I wasn’t contemplating marriage on account of what Caroline was wearing, but how she wore it. Her clothing was modest, yes, but more importantly, she was modest. This was what I had but dimly apprehended at the first. My wife was not wearing jumpers because she liked them (she didn’t and still does not) or because she believed them to be particularly fashionable (they passed out of vogue, oh, some 30 years ago), but because she felt that they were accessory to a modest spirit (that, and they were all her mother could sew at the time, it being very difficult to find anything in the department store agreeable to modest deportment.)
After meeting Caroline and her family, I was introduced to quite a few other ladies who were careful and considerate of their appearance – not too be revealing with the clothing they wore. Not all of them were modest. The one’s that were the most modest in their dress were, in many instances, the least modest, if you follow me. I could go on and on about why I think this is, but I shan’t, for the Modest Mom says I should draw this post to a close. I hope you will not take my comments as license to dress like everyone else for they are in no way intended to encourage such a course, for although it is possible to be truly immodest while modestly dressed, it is impossible to be immodestly dressed and truly modest. No, my post is intended to encourage the cultivation of a modest spirit and all that it implies – and yes, this process involves taking a good hard look at your standards of dress and adjusting them if necessary (whether you dress modestly or not). In the end, modest clothing does not the Modest Mom make, but they are an appendage unto her. If it were merely modest clothing that adorned my wife when first I met her, I would have dismissed her taste in clothes as sadly misinformed by some obscure, puritanical interpretation of scripture. As it was, however, she wore a meek and quiet spirit which was, and is, of great price in the sight of God, and it had the blessed effect of drawing me nearer to my Savior.

15 Comments on She Wears Skirts: A Meek And Quiet Spirt

  1. Ahhh, one thing. There is a wide array of Anabaptists. Not all of us have such a doctrine built around dress (I dress modestly, but it is not doctrine among evangelical Friends churches.) And I have not once in my life heard one Anabaptist teacher within my demonination or Mennonite (not counting old-order) teach about 2 kingdoms. I understand where you are going, but I'd be careful with the "all anabaptists….." train of thought. You aren't speaking for, nor accurately reflecting "all" of us. 😉

  2. "As it was, however, she wore a meek and quiet spirit which was, and is, of great price in the sight of God, and it had the blessed effect of drawing me nearer to my Savior."

    I love this, and it clearly states how we should all be living our lives. It is my hope that my actions will be such that they will draw others to the Lord.

  3. I must confess, I wish I'd read the comments before they got deleted. I guess that's my flesh and not my meek and quiet spirit showing! For me, I cannot fathom what objections someone would have to your husband's beautiful observations and tribute to you and God 🙂

  4. @ Noel,

    The comments we deleted were based on the context of the article we deleted, not what is shown above. Does that make sense? I'm in bed recovering from strep, and my head is a bit foggy right now. 🙂

  5. Thanks for this article, the subject is one that I wish all Christian women really understood and took to heart, with a desire to be pleasing and glorifying to God and to consider others before themselves. Personally, I strive to wear skirts and dresses often, not only to be modest but also feminine, which I belive is glorifying to God since he created male and female. In the world today the distinctions between the two have become so intentionally blurred, and I think that many people allow that blurriness to influence their wardrobe without realizing it's significance.

  6. I have to admit – I'm still not convinced/convicted that the blurred lines between the sexes is directly related to wearing PANTS… But I recently read another article where one woman said she wears skirts b/c her husband likes it – and the same is true of my husband. SO- I am making an effort to bless him in this area (with a teensy bit of trepidation). =]

  7. I so wish I could have read the unedited version of this article… I'm on the verge of a HUGE change and currently soaking up every scrap of information I can related to wearing only skirts…

  8. I LOVE this post. Even when I didn't understand why I felt more comfortable when I was well-covered, I DID understand that modesty was lady-like. I am very convicted to teach my daughter the Biblical version of womanhood, despite what my 'liberated' mother instilled in me. -Christine

  9. “Meek” is nearly the LAST adjective I would want applied to myself or my daughters. I can only hope it has somehow a positive connotation in Biblical terms. “Meek” and “modest” are not the same thing nowadays.

  10. Meek: Enduring injury with patience and without resentment. This is an attribute of gentleness, and absolutely consistent with and an admirable quality of modesty in spirit. May the Lord help me be meek as I raise my children.

  11. I had to laugh when your husband said he hadn’t really ever thought about how a person dressed until meeting you. The same could definitely be said of my husband…until I began clothing our daughters in dresses and wearing skirts myself. Suddenly this man who seemed indifferent to clothing in general began expressing an appreciation for skirts and handing out compliments left and right. More than once, after seeing too much skin on a female bystander, he will remark his thankfulness that that isn’t one of his girls. When I began my own modesty journey, it had more to do with training up my daughters than anything else, but it has become so much more than that. It is simpler, it is freeing and it changes the heart in a way I hadn’t expected. Not to mention the welcome praise of my man!

  12. I was particularly intrigued by the comments on the modesty of spirit and it stirs within my heart to have and express such a spirit but I work outside the home as a nurse and my passion is emergency medicine. I am not sure how to reconcile a quiet modest spirit with working in such a high adrenaline, high stress, career field filled with men who will run you over if you show even a hint of weakness. Any help would be appreciated.

    • I personally don’t think a modest spirit means you have to be quiet as a mouse. There is such a thing as being graciously strong, not crass or crude, basically demanding respect out of these driven men that work around you.

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