Desperate: Hope For The Weary Mom

The huge release for Desperate has come and gone, the prizes have been mailed, the book studies are currently going on online and offline, and I’ve just had time to read it. Let me tell you, I stand corrected in my opinion of it.

A lot of the reviews I read about the book led me to believe that the book was basically about the fact that younger moms really needed a mentor in life, a Titus 2 woman who could come along and help them when the going got tough. I figured I had the book all pegged, I knew what it was about and I didn’t need to read it.

Then I was sent a copy to review. I stayed up until midnight reading it, fighting the urge to close my eyes and sleep because I wanted to see what the next page said, and the next and the next.

Because I’ve been there.

I have been a desperate mom before, a mom who was so drowning in fatigue and un-balanced hormones that I went to bed at 8:00 when my children did. A mom who didn’t know how she could make it through the day because the dishes were piled up high, the laundry room was overflowing into the dining room, the baby had kept me up all night, and my strong-willed child was testing every limit possible.

The reality is there are still some days where I feel desperate. There are days I literally cry out to God and simply say “O Lord please help me” when it feels like I can’t go on. But after reading this book, it was incredibly refreshing to be able to relate to Sarah Mae as she wrote about being in the parenting journey with young children, and to be inspired by Sally as she shares her wisdom being on the other end of parenting, having successfully homeschooled and raised five children. To hear a mom come along and encourage you to let go of the minor stresses of parenting (you know, the “I just mopped the floor and my son walks through with muddy feet” stress) and instead focus on establishing relationships with your children.

I’ve read several parenting books that are highly recommended, authors that promise that if you do abc that your children will turn out like xy and z. But my children have not turned out that way. Every Sunday I bring my 13 month to church and feel the guilt that she won’t sit still in church, because I have a certain child training book in my head chastising me that I haven’t trained her to sit still yet. Reading Desperate was a good reminder that we are not bound by man’s laws. These child training books are good suggestions (and some are biblically sound suggestions), but does the Bible really tell me that my 13 month old must sit still through a church service or else I’m sinning? If my daughter is still not potty trained at 3 does that make me a terrible mother? Absolutely not!

As women we need to come together and encourage each other, give a helpful word of encouragement when it is needed, a friendly phone call to check in and make sure we are ok. We do not need yet another gossiper, or a judgmental woman tearing us apart with her legalism regarding how we are supposed to be following a certain schedule or diet or ____ and if we don’t do those things we must not measure up to the Christian Woman club.

We desperately need true women of God that will say words of truth. Because regardless of what many think, there is a right and wrong. There are certain standards that are absolute truth for every women walking this earth. But following one person’s schedule does not fit into that truth. We are told to love our husbands, love our children, and to be keepers at home (Titus 2). How that will translate into each individual home will vary, but the principle is there and does not alter from one woman to the next.

If you are exhausted and weary, perhaps you can find a handful of ladies and go through a Desperate Book Study together. Take heart tired, aching mothers. You are not alone, but you do need encouragement to keep going. The job is 24/7 with very little breaks, but you can’t give up. The stakes are too high, the end results so precious. A precious soul being raised for the Lord, another warrior for God’s army. Press on mothers, and leave a heritage so wonderful that your children will “rise up and call you blessed.”

You can order desperate through Amazon, or look at your local Christian bookstore.