When You Have To Just Say No

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Just say no.

The world is screaming for our children. All around us, within churches and without, there are influences that try to grab ahold of our families.

Just say no.

Just say No. It's hard to do, but oh so necessary.

When everyone around you is culturally engaged and you feel like the only who doesn’t watch that show, or that movie (you know, the one that has everyone talking), don’t give in.

Just say no.

When your children come begging for video games, and the latest and greatest toy that you don’t feel comfortable with, it’s ok to stand against the crowd.

No is not always the bad word our children like to make it out that it is. It can be a blessed thing.

If your family feels alone, like you are the only one who cares about the influences of the world, dressing modestly, and not letting your children date at 13, don’t feel bad.

You are not alone. It’s ok to stand against the crowd and just say no.

We recently have had to say no to several different situations that have come up. It’s not always been easy. Our children have been disappointed, but we knew it was for the best. I realized there might be other families out there who feel like they are the only ones standing against the crowd, and just wanted to send you a word of encouragement.

You are not the only one with the finger stuck in the wall, holding back the water. Let the floods pour, but they won’t enter our home!

“He that followeth after righteousness and mercy findeth life, righteousness, and honor. ” Psalm 21:22

Sometimes we read these scriptures and don’t take the time to truly ponder on the magnitude of them. If we seek righteousness, we find life! That is a huge promise!

Let’s continue to seek after the kingdom of God together. Even if you don’t have a friend that you can physically link arms with as you walk this path together, just remember you have some online!



Stop Running On Empty: An Amazing Resource To Help Busy Women!

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Physical and mental exhaustion is something I am far too familiar with. Trying to juggle being a wife, a mom of six children, homeschooling, homemaking, running a business, support my husband as he currently is the pastor at our church, and be a sister and friend as well, can be a bit overwhelming!

Now, I wouldn’t change a thing about it. I am so blessed and thankful for my amazing family…but that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve had to learn a thing or two these last few years about taking care of myself. 

You see, I stink at it. I don’t often get enough sleep, I struggle to drink enough water, I struggle to get in my exercise routine (even though I know I desperately need it), and tend to just push myself to do more and be more.

Does this sound familiar? 

I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m not alone in this. In fact, I’m pretty sure that most women stink at really taking care of themselves and investing in themselves.

But the thing is – it’s vitally important to stop every once in a while, even for 5-15 minutes, to refresh ourselves, fill ourselves up, and maybe even spend a few minutes reading a book or sitting outside in the sun. As women, we have to stop and refuel. To pour back into ourselves so that we have the energy and the JOY to pour back into serving our families and the Lord. 

And that’s why I’m so excited to share with you about this brand new 7 part audio series all about investing in yourself…all for God’s Glory! (Find out how to get it for FREE below)


Taking the time to invest in myself, to care for my body, and invest in my spiritual life are all vital parts of being a homemaker. I need to take a little bit of time each time to invest in myself so that I have the energy and joy to pour back into my family…otherwise I might just face some severe burn out and face my days with a begrudging attitude instead of joy in the Lord!

Do you crave a little more energy, joy, and enthusiasm when facing your day? Do you wish that when you hear the kids stirring after their nap time, that you had the energy and focus to greet that sound with joy and energy to tackle the rest of your day instead of the dreaded 3 o’clock exhaustion?

This all starts with taking just a little bit of time to invest in yourself. I have learned this the hard way after years of running around like a mad woman trying to get everything done…and then hitting a wall of fatigue and despair. I want to greet my day with joy and energy! 

Throughout this 7 part audio series, Jami Balmet (a dear blogging friend!) will be diving into all the aspects of taking care of ourselves (and why this truly matters if we want to have a thriving home and relationship with the Lord). In the series she will talk about:

  • Avoiding burn out and letting go of GUILT when we do invest a little in ourselves
  • Making time for what you love (in 15 minutes a day)
  • Taking care of yourself – exercise and eating well
  • Investing in your Spiritual Life
  • Giving yourself GRACE…especially when life falls apart
  • Wrapping it all together for God’s Glory!


When it officially launches next week, you can purchase it for $25 and get access right away to go through it. BUT when you purchase a premium ticket to this year’s Homemaking Ministries Online Conference through October 20th, you will get FREE access to the audio series! 

The conference officially kicks off next week (October 25th-28th) and when you register by Thursday for a premium ticket not only will you get free access to this audio series but you will also get a full ticket to the conference (you can listen to the sessions anytime…you get to keep them forever!) and a brand new goal setting course (which you get immediate access to).

Find out more & sign up today! >>

This year’s conference is shaping up to be incredible!! We’ve got 17 amazing speakers lined up to deliver 20 conference sessions throughout the four days. The theme for this year is Finding Balance in Your Home and each session addresses various aspects of how to find and achieve balance in your home…all for God’s Glory!

Here’s the incredible line up we’ve got:

Session #1: Achieving Balance in Our Lives (A Definition) – Jami Balmet
Session #2: Cultivating the Lovely in the Everyday – MacKenzie Monroe from Bold Turqious
Session #3: How to Create a Lasting & Loving Marriage – Jolene Engle from Joleneengle.com
Session #4: Balance in Spending Time Online – Mandy Hoffman from mandyhoffman.com
Session #5: Balance in Housekeeping – Hilary Bernstein from No Place Like Home
Session #6: Finding Balance in Spiritual Disciplines (What’s Really Important) – Jami Balmet
Session #7: Balance in Meal Planning (So You Won’t Go Crazy) – Stacy Myers from Humorous Homemaking
Session #8: Finding Balance in Healthy Living (Or, how to be crunchy without being a nut) – Trisha Gilkerson from Intoxicated on Life
Session #9: Balancing Priorities for Greater Joy in Your Home – Jennifer Ross from The Focused Homemaker
Session #10: Balancing Homemaking and Homeschooling – Tauna Meyer from The Proverbial Homemaker
Session #11: Focusing on the Gospel Throughout the Week – Jami Balmet
Session #12: Balance in Motherhood – Christy Fitzwater from christyfitzwater.com
Session #13: Creating Balance for the Working Homemaker – Caroline Allen from The Modest Mom (Me!)
Session #14: Finding Balance in Relationships – Angie Tolpin from Courageous Mom
Session #15: Living a Life of Ministry (Even When You Can’t Leave the House) – Katie Bennett from Embracing a Simpler Life
Session #16: Making Scripture Memory a priority in your day – Carlie Kervechal from Today’s Frugal Mom and Fulfilling Your Vows
Session #17: Balance in Planning – Marlene Griffith from A Diligent Heart
Session #18: Balance in Healthy Eating – Kelly Smith from The Nourishing Home
Session #19: A Startup Guide to Simplifying Your Stuff – Elsie Callendar from Richly Rooted
Session #20: Finding Purpose and Cultivating Joy in Your Home – Jami Balmet


Bonus #2: Goal Setting Course and Workbook

Do you still need another reason to sign up for the conference? When you purchase a premium ticket you also get access to our brand new Goal Setting Course and Workbook all about setting priorities for you day, effectively planning, creating a family mission statement, and more!


Happy Mother’s Day, and A Tribute!

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My sister wrote this tribute to our mom yesterday and said I could share it here on the blog. Mother’s Day is now painful and beautiful, all mixed together. I go shopping for a Mother’s Day card, but it’s for my step-mom. I see all these cards I would like to buy my mom, and just wish I told her enough how much I loved her, and cared for her when she was still here on earth.

To those of you with children, Happy Mother’s Day! Enjoy your blessings.

To those of you without children and struggling with infertility, all I can say is press on. Don’t give up hope that God has a plan for your life. I’ve watched the raw painful journey of what infertility looks like, and seen that person continue to trust God over and over again, even though there are still moments of tears. God is faithful, despite trials.

To those of you who are missing your mom today, I understand. Those feelings are raw, and you never truly understand them until you have experienced it. I’ll never forget the horrible feeling that came over me when my best friend, my mother took her last breath. I was alone with her in the room, and I desperately wanted to somehow bring her back to life again. It’s almost been six years now, and God has been there to comfort me, and helped me through the tears and heartache.

Here is what my sister wrote.

“Her children arise up, and call her blessed.” Prov. 31:28

Mother and daughter

My mom with my sister
I miss my Mom every single day. This is a photo of my Mom helping me when I was a little girl. I have such wonderful memories of my childhood. My Mom was always watching out for me, helping me, teaching me, loving me, trying to encourage me to follow Christ. From my youngest years I remember seeing her face just light up when she smiled or laughed. She loved being with people, cared about them, enjoyed visiting, and was just in general such a happy outgoing woman. If Mom was happy, our entire family was happy. I remember thinking as a little girl how beautiful my Mom was. I hoped I could be like her when I grew up. 

Mom and daughter

My mom and myself (Caroline). I treasure this picture as I received hugs like this constantly from her. She was always there to comfort me, no matter how sick or tired she felt. 

My Mom was my best friend. I watched my Mom walk through health issues and other serious trials for most of the life I knew. She had Lupus for the last 17 years. I remember the days she almost died, I remember the entire year she spent in bed being so ill when I was 16. I remember ambulances, hospital stays, blood draws, more doctor appointments I took her to than I care to remember. She lived through such heartache. I wondered how she could possibly have the strength to go on. Truth was she told me, she didn’t have the strength. She had to cry out from the depths of her soul to God, and He gave her what she needed time and time again. He threw her a life jacket in the storms of life each time she thought she would drown. I watched her cry, I watched her fight, I watched her stand back up. Finally, I watched her die. I learned what really matters when you are about to enter eternity. I learned how to put life into true perspective. I learned I don’t want to waste the life God has given me.

My Mom taught me what it meant to have charity, the true love of Christ, for others. My Mom taught me to forgive. My Mom taught me there was nothing on earth more important than my soul and where it was in connection with God. My Mom taught me to be strong. My Mom taught me to look at people’s hearts, not just the outward body that was seen by my eyes. My Mom taught me to love the scriptures, to love beauty, to love listening to birds singing in the trees, to love being outdoors, to love music, to love singing praises to God. My Mom taught me to honor, respect, and care for those who were ill, elderly, and weak. My Mom taught me to be thankful for life itself. My Mom taught me to be grateful for the health I enjoyed. My Mom taught me what joy was. 

Mom and daughters

A happy mom with her two daughters! 

I wish so much I had told my Mom more often what she meant to me when she was alive. I wish I had talked to her more, asked her questions I never asked, hugged her a million times, told her I Love You all the times I didn’t.

My Mom is gone from this earth now, but I have her memory with me every day. I recognize and understand as a mother myself now just how blessed I was. I had such an incredible Mom! I hope in some way I can be a mother like her to my children. I love you Mother Dear!

A wonderful, godly grandmother!

This picture is a few months before she passed. The Lupus had gone to her brain at this point, but she still showed such beautiful radiance and joy, as she daily learned to keep putting her trust in the Lord. So thankful she was able to meet 4 of her grandchildren and enjoy them! 

Confessions From A Husband About Homemaking

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Confessions From A Husband About Homemaking

You may have heard – the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle is here. Even I’m excited about it! And why shouldn’t I be? For the past two years I’ve seen how it encourages my wife with its excellent resources and helpful tips. Homemaking is not a sprint, it’s a marathon and anything that can help keep a spring in my wife’s step deserves my appreciation.

I didn’t always think in this way. My early views on keeping a home were, well, cringe worthy.

As you may have learned by reading this blog, I like to keep things clean. When I was in High School I began keeping my room, my car, and my things meticulously. My first job was at a local grocery store and I relished the challenge of finding efficient ways to fill a grocery sack as the food beeped across the scanner. A few of you out there might relate but at this point most of you are probably pitying Caroline for ever having married me. Read on. : )

Sean and Caroline

Years later Caroline and I met, and for all of the wonderful things about our courtship it failed to disclose just how different she and I were in this area. That’s not to say that Caroline likes a good mess. It’s just that messes don’t speak to her the same way they do me.

Random stuff on the living room floor likes to jaw at me. It laughs at me; calls me names. I have to shut it up. To Caroline its saying, “Here we are, out of our places. No hurry though. We know you’ll pick us up when its convenient for you.”

So, of course she walks by as if it weren’t there. I simply can’t. Or should I say “couldn’t”. Six children does something to you in this regard. The stuff just kind of grins at me now – no words. I think I’m improving – don’t you?

Early marriage, though, was different. I can remember coming home from work and Caroline telling me that she had taken a nap during the day. “A nap?” I thought. Whatever for? I mean, it’s just you here, in this tiny house. You shop for groceries and you clean this house and you need a nap? (Are you cringing yet?)

There were days where she only had energy or time to tidy up one room before I got home. I’d walk through the door, size things up and quietly make my displeasure known, never mind acknowledging the work she did accomplish. This always hurt her a great deal. Ok, now I’m cringing.

“Yes you fool, she needs a nap. And no, she doesn’t need you guilting her into keeping the house clean!” That’s the me of today talking to the me of yesterday, or, at least that’s what I’d say if given the chance.

Starting a home based business really altered my thinking on this. You see, I was home more, and the more I was home the more I was able to see just how difficult, how complex, how thankless, how physically draining, and how mentally taxing homemaking really is.

Simplicity Quote on Motherhood

I quickly began to realize that not only did my wife occasionally need a nap to help her through the burden of the day, she deserved something eminently more important – encouragement. On a daily basis. From me.

I saw so many needs pressing upon her every day. I saw, with my own eyes, how the tasks she performed were critical to the overall wellbeing my home. To the casual onlooker, of course, these are menial, unlovely tasks not worthy of respect. The mother’s role in society is not exactly an exalted one, and my wife had long since come to terms with the way the world views what she does.

But what about the way her husband viewed it? Did she find honor and praise for her work from him? Something a wife simply cannot and should not be expected to endure is disrespect from within the home, particularly from her husband. He is, without a doubt, the best person to provide the encouraging words of appreciation she so desperately needs and legitimately deserves. She can endure the slings and arrows of the world’s harsh judgement if only he will affirm her work and bless her constancy.

I could have spared my wife a lot of hurt feelings if I would have made more of an effort to better acquaint myself with the demands of her work in the home.

Now I’m a true believer. My wife is irreplaceable. Her work is legitimately difficult. Most men couldn’t handle it. I mean it – they couldn’t handle it. It places physical and mental demands on her that I didn’t know even existed until I spent some time by her side.

Joyful Motherhood!

Too many men treat housekeeping like professional sports. The greatest athletes make what they do look easy to the point that in some of our more delusional moments we think we could actually do what they do. It’s just like that with our wives. They make it look easy, and we think, “Homemaking – nothing to it.” What nonsense. If that’s the way we look at housekeeping is it any wonder that they receive so little encouragement from us?

So that’s my little plug for not only the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle, but all forms of encouragement we can give our wives. Caroline gets excited about the bundle every year. It helps to keep her spirits up. It motivates and inspires her. I’m all for it. God knows she has a difficult job.

**Caroline here – I have to let you know my husband totally, completely surprised me by writing this. I didn’t ask him to do this, and I was deeply humbled by what he shared here. I love my husband so much, and am thankful for his encouragement!**

Surprise! It’s the very last day of the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle sale! I would hate for you guys to miss out on purchasing this bundle, especially because the bonus offers are incredible. A free subscription to Right Start Media for a year, where you receive a streaming video library that includes films for all ages!

Some of the items include:

  • VeggieTales
  • Adventures in Odyssey
  • 3-2-1 Penguins
  • What’s In the Bible
  • Boz the Bear
  • Chuck Swindoll’s Paws & Tales series for kids
  •  Bible studies by Francis Chan, John MacArthur, Dave Ramsey, and John Maxwell for adults.

You also receive a free cleaning kit from Grove! As you all know, Mrs. Meyer’s are my favorite cleaning products, and I LOVE getting my cleaning supplies and diapers from Grove!

Bonus offers with Ultimate Homemaking Bundle!

Here is the complete list!

  • FREE Mrs. Meyer’s Dish Soap, Mrs. Meyer’s Multi Surface Spray, Grove Collaborative Spray Bottle, Grove Collaborative Scrubber Sponges and FREE 60-day VIP trial with FREE shipping from Grove Collaborative ($30 value)
  • FREE Online Class from Craftsy ($29.99-$69.99 value)
  • FREE Kids Discovery Box from GreenKidCrafts.com ($19.95 value)
  • $15 Gift Certificate to InkWELL Press ($15 value)
  • $15 Credit to Hope Ink Shop PLUS Two FREE 8×10 Art Prints with Any Purchase ($71)
  • FREE SPOT Treatment for Acne & Eczema OR a $15 Gift Certificate from Bloom Naturals ($15 value)
  • FREE 90-Day Pro Membership to ListPlanIt.com ($30)
  • FREE 1-Year MollyGreen.com Membership ($29 value)
  • FREE Hand Massage Routine Videos from Melt Couples Massage ($24 value)

But there is MORE!!!

I’ve given out an incredible amount of flexi clips already. It’s crazy how many I’ll be shipping out, but it’s about to get even crazier!

40 more ladies have a chance to obtain an item from Lilla Rose, today only! And it’s the first 40 who purchase an Ultimate Homemaking Bundle through my link!

Buy Now

It’s going to be a little different this time around. Some of you will be receiving bobby pin sets from Lilla Rose, and some of you will be receiving flexi clips. Just fill out the form with your top 2 preferred sizes of flexi clips, and you will be surprised when your package arrives. It might be a flexi clip, or it might be a pair of bobby pins!

Remember, it’s the first 40 only! These went super fast last time! There is a small shipping fee you pay for these, but otherwise they are free! And it’s only for USA customers, unless international customers want to pay for the extra shipping!

Purchase the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle and receive a FREE Flexi Clip, plus a $10 gift certificate to Deborah & Co.

After you grab your bundle, fill out this google form to receive your item from Lilla Rose and the $10 gift certificate to Deborah & Co. 

Buy Now

(Republished  – Originally this post was written April of 2015)



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